Perfection and Strain

Yesterday was a bad day.

I got angry. Very angry. Murderously angry. And unfortunately, once I get to that point it is difficult to get not angry anymore. I was awake until 3-something. I got about 5 hours of sleep. At least I know that I can still function on that little.

So I am trying to move and complete homework and work full time and it isn't working. My brain is not dealing with the strain well. I already took a day off of work because of it and I never take a day off unless I have to for medical reasons (granted, it was after a very tough day but still, unheard of).

On to yesterday.

I had just finished a stressful school project and was battling with a few technical errors (having to upload a video to YouTube and remake my PowerPoint) and as I waited I decided that I should buy my furniture as I could now transfer the money out of savings for it. I decided to buy Ikea for the main furniture and was really looking forward to my future rooms...

Didn't end up that way because Ikea wouldn't get to my apartment until 8/30/18... I move in on the 9th and I couldn't see waiting that long for my bed, dresser, tv stand, bookcases, etc. Well, some I could wait on but not the bed. And that was upsetting because I really wanted that bed.

So I had to replan my entire apartment, basically. The only thing that is the same is my couch (not being bought from Ikea) and my chair (which I can wait on).

That sucked. I was angry. I kinda still am.

Well, once I found my furniture and began the process of buying it new problems arose. My bank and Walmart were having difficulties, my card was locked (although my transaction went through, supposedly). This morning, the main bulk of my transaction was canceled (except for my couch, luckily). Called the bank and had my card reopened. Called Walmart and they reset the system and told me to try again in an hour.

I do not like spending money. This is a stressful time for me already. Now I have to spend that money AGAIN when it was upsetting enough the first time.

I had great plans for this apartment and this process and none of this was a part of it. I had planned perfection in buying the furniture and in what furniture I would receive and how my apartment would end up looking.

Not to be so.

It will still be mine and beautiful and lovely but it isn't what I had planned and that is slightly upsetting.